пятница, 17 октября 2008 г.

cyber pci




DEATH

All I�can say is that the photos shown today was horrifying. Itapos;s horrifying as well to see the ways people get killed, slashed one another, and turn out to be after death. Life is so brief and fragile. One guy got hit by a fallen cupboard and his face was twisted to one side. A mother was pregnant with two babies, one outside the womb and the other inside; her body could not take the pressure and all died. And another one with multiple laceration (slashes) on his face, from a gang fight maybe. The tsunami victims. And rape victims as well. Their wounds... Sigh...

But all these just make me feel the weakness of life. And the cruelty of mankind.

The gore and horror of horrifying dead bodies eats into you, but in a way that it tells you the fragility of life. The forensic pathologist told us one thing he learned from the job was that to live life to the fullest.
I agree wholeheartedly. Cherish life.

DISAPPOINTMENT

Itapos;s a wonderful irony when I said cherish life, but here I am giving up on life. I�saw improvement in my school work, but alas, everyone improve with me. So, my results are still below mean. I wonapos;t hide my disappointment. Because I�have put in effort but had not been able to see any results yielded. Iapos;ve repeated this for a hundred and one times. I wonder how much more times do I�have to go on. I�hate this.

LOVE. OR�NOT.

Had a discussion with a friend last night. I told him no one could ever make me have that same feeling ever again, since many many years ago. It was just that one girl. Fast-thumping heart, tongue-tied, doing silly things, waking up in the middle of the night in tears, living in paranoia... Etc. The others after her were just like a trail to get over her. Iapos;m determined not to fall into such sorrows anymore.

And if so, why am I�missing someone else for more than half a day now? Though Iapos;ve just seen her today?

The most imperfect person would most probably be the only perfect person in your life. No more were the days you were frantically searching for Snow White nor Prince Charming. Reality settles in with age.

Half of me says that the heart has died many many years ago. It could never love, never feel, never healed. This I assumed to be the rationale half. The other half says nothing. It shows me paranoia about the possibility of losing someone, and yet the happiness of being with someone. It is the irrational half. Itapos;s frustrating that even scientific research has to divide the brain into left and right.

Sometimes I think, if I�were ever to get married, Iapos;ll have a high tendency to have an affair. And conceal it very well, That is, if I�donapos;t blog.

I couldnapos;t really differentiate well between reliance and love. Or perhaps, they are just the same. No one told me that either.

I have strict rules that govern my choice of people around me. True friends are those whom I�never ever talk about money. A simple meal or drinks would go without having to pour out the money on the table. They are those whom will call me even in midnight and I wonapos;t scream at them. My hp is on 24 hours most days, so if youapos;re a friend Iapos;ll make the effort to reply you before going back to sleep. And they are those whom Iapos;ll stand up for them even if people want to hack them to death.

But there is only one special one in my life. This, I can give up my life in exchange for hers any time she asks for it. Perhaps this is what I�defined as "that special feeling". Maybe Iapos;m a little too extreme. But it came, and went, and could never be found again.

I know, Iapos;m just trying to make a conscious effort to reject everyone I deem possible for one that is impossible. Trying hard to shut off, but it didnapos;t seem to be working.

Most of the time, I really hate myself for being such a fool.



conduit grounding clamp, cyber pci, cyber pc systems, cyber pc system, cyber pc power.



Комментариев нет: